ideasthatspark - Connect
Meet the Family
Posted: Sep 3, 2009 4:43 PM
Updated: Sep 3, 2009 4:43 PM
More often than not, Grandma doesn't live right down the street anymore. Neither do aunts, uncles or cousins, for that matter. But distance shouldn't be an excuse for losing touch. "Staying close as a family gives us a sense of connection and belonging. Knowing where we come from keeps us grounded," says family communication coach Dale Susan Edmonds, creator of Talk-Early-Talk-Often, a website devoted to family networking.
Unless you're loaded with frequent flier miles, here are some low-cost ways to bridge the distance between you and your relatives:
Have virtual visits With videoconferencing, you can hear and see your relatives in real time on your home computer. All you need is a Webcam (they're built in to most new computers or you can pick one up for around $30) and an Internet connection. Edmonds suggests setting up a weekly phone visit -- say, after Sunday dinner -- or organizing virtual parties with the whole gang in attendance.
Blog your life Hearing about the mundane events of everyday life -- the dishwasher leaked, the azaleas bloomed -- makes people feel intimately connected to one another. "Even though little events may seem irrelevant, they are actually vital for building close, comfortable bonds," Edmonds says. Keep relatives up to date by creating a long-distance blog (you can get a free account at websites like Xanga). Once a day, jot down even the least newsworthy "news" so that relatives anywhere in the world can log on and feel like a part of your life.
Let pictures tell the story The grandparents don't own a computer? Not to worry. For less technologically savvy family members, take snapshots of your life -- your husband's pink-splattered shirt after a blender debacle, for example -- and print them out on a color printer. Add a line or two ("Today Greg learned to wait till the blender stops spinning before taste-testing the smoothie!") and ship them off by good old U.S. mail. Make a copy for yourself and voila -- instant scrapbook.
Share a hobby Like your own mini book club, relatives can read the same books, watch the same movies, or even knit similar sweaters -- and check in with each other along the way to discuss how it's going. This is also true for many online games (Pogo, Funster, Playsite), which you can play as individuals or in teams against relatives in other parts of the world in real time. Kids love to interact online at kids' sites like Webkinz, where they can play trivia and arcade games together and even send presents and notes.
Send a care package You loved it at sleep-away camp, and it hasn't lost its luster. "Care packages are a great connection-building tool when the giver knows the receiver's likes and dislikes," Edmonds says. And there's no need to break the bank. Send an envelope with old, nostalgic photographs, stickers, poems or drawings. Or create a theme -- the season or a particular milestone -- and have everyone in the family make a contribution.
Include relatives in your rituals Build interaction with relatives into your family's regular routine. You might call Grandpa every night at 8:30 for a bedtime story for your child; meet your sister at a supermarket halfway between you to keep each other company while you shop; or plan an annual group vacation. "The idea that we have to make ourselves call our loved ones sounds terrible," says Edmonds, "but the fact of the matter is that we are busy, and if we don't do something at a said time, too often the moment just passes us by."
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